Thursday, February 20, 2014

Improved Lede - Steve Horan

Improved Lede


Bad Lede:

"You don't have to be strictly a man or a woman on Facebook anymore In a nod to the "it's complicated" sexual identities of many of its users, the social network on Thursday added a third "custom" gender option for people's profiles. In addition to Male or Female, Facebook now lets U.S. users choose among some 50 additional options such as "transgender," "cisgender," "gender fluid," "intersex" and "neither."



Improved Lede:

It's complicated. Facebook no longer requires a user to choose Male or Female. There are now over 50 options for the hundreds of millions of users to choose from. The reactions to this change are sure to prove innumerable as well.


Reasons:

I felt the original lede laid out the entire story and didn't leave a promise to be fulfilled. My lead introduces the subject and references some core statistics; however, the final sentence promises that the story will expand beyond the lede in the nutgrafs.

1 comment:

  1. This was discussed in class. Stephen, I completely agreed with Jeremy and thought the first lede had that sense of light patter about a deeply personal issue. What a beautiful rewrite.

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